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 Our Resting at the River’s Edge reading for Tuesday included Numbers 13 – the story of Moses sending out the thirteen leaders (note that they were the leaders of their tribes) to spy out the land God had promised to give them.

     Then Caleb silenced the people before Moses and said, “We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it.”
    But the men who had gone up with him said, “We can’t attack those people; they are stronger than we are.” And they spread among the Israelites a bad report about the land they had explored. They said, “The land we explored devours those living in it. All the people we saw there are of great size. We saw the Nephilim there (the descendants of Anak come from the Nephilim). We seemed like grasshoppers in our own eyes, and we looked the same to them.”
          Numbers 13:30-33

It seems to me that there will always be giants in the land the Lord has promised us. If there weren’t, there would be no need for us to conquer it.

As I read the passage, the Holy Spirit was whispering a question in my ear. I’d like to share it with you.

“What giants are in your life that you need to conquer?”

Sometimes the answer to that is obvious – you know you’re fighting giants and you’re calling out for God’s help. Other times, though, we get so caught up with life that we don’t recognize the giant that has his hand on our forehead holding us in place while we pump our arms and legs trying to run.

I immediately stopped writing and started journaling – listening to the Lord and praying, then writing what Giants I am allowing to keep me in place so that I am not entering the land the Lord has promised me. I confessed unbelief that I didn’t realize I had, and I expressed confidence in God’s ability to take me into the promised land.

Now it’s your turn. What giants are in your life that you need to conquer?

I concluded my journal with the following simple prayer:

“Lord, You are greater…Help me to walk with confidence into the land, knowing that You have gone before me and have paved the way….Lord, I want to be Joshua and Caleb, not all of the other ten…Lord help me to move to that place beyond faith where I know, despite what I see…”

Do you want to be like Joshua and Caleb or the other ten? I encourage you to take time today to ask God for the vision and courage to fight the giants He has allowed to inhabit your promised land.

The book of Ruth has many subtexts in it – some describe it as a love story; some see it as an illustration of what happens when we leave Bethlehem (which means “House of Bread) – like Naomi (which means “pleasant”), God deals with us severely and we return as Mara (which means “bitter”); some see it as a pre-Christ example of being redeemed by our kinsman-redeemer.

I read the entire book in one sitting. The underlying theme I read today was one of the blessings that follow those who are faithful to do the right thing.

Ruth could have gone back home to her family in Moab, but she chose to honor her dead husband and follow her beloved mother-in-law to a strange land. Once there, she willingly served her mother-in-law. Scripture says she went into the field from early morning until dusk, then threshed all she had picked into wheat. She did this for many months. When Boaz found her in his fields the first day, he treated her kindly and instructed his servants to treat her well. When Naomi told Ruth to go to Boaz as their family (kinsman) redeemer, she did so. When Boaz found Ruth at the foot of his bed, he treated her honorably that night and made a point of sending grain home with her to Naomi. Then Boaz did the right thing by first going to a family member closer than he to ask if this man wanted to become the kinsman-redeemer. When he would not, Boaz married Ruth, she gave birth to a son and Mara (Naomi) was no longer bitter, but was blessed.

The journey from Moab to Bethlehem could not have been easy for either Ruth or Naomi. Finding herself in a strange city and venturing out to gather grain could not have been easy for Ruth. I imagine that following her mother-in-law’s instructions to go to Boaz at night held its share of fearful consequences for Ruth. Perhaps even marrying Boaz was an act of obedience in the midst of fear. He had treated her honorably, but one could hardly say she knew him.

Life had not treated Ruth kindly. But she continued to do the right things and God showed Himself to be faithful to her.

Sometimes we’re in a time in our life where things are not easy. God does not always seem to be near and bad things happen to good people. But Ruth showed herself to be a woman of character by continuing to do the right thing in the midst of it all. And God honored her faithfulness. He provided a kinsman-redeemer, someone to care for her. He provided a family for her. He gave her a son, Obed, and he gave her a lasting legacy. Obed was the father of Jesse, who was the father of David. That would be King David, a man after God’s own heart.

“Thank You, Lord, that You are who You are and that You’ve created me in Your likeness. Thank You that nothing touches me without first going through Your hands. Thank you that nothing that comes my way today is more than I can handle, but each circumstances has been allowed by You and foreseen by You. Nothing takes You by surprise. Thank You that You have already prepared me for all that will come my way today. And those things that I think I can’t handle – well, that’s just a lie from Satan, because I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. And even better than that, thank You that You will use everything that happens to me today to make me more like Jesus, in whom I trust and in whose name I pray. His name is above all names – His name is above every circumstance and situation in which I will find myself in today. And His name has authority that is greater than all those other things. Thank You, Lord, that You are who You are. Imminently worthy of my worship and adoration. Amen.”

Try it. It will change your whole perspective as you begin your day.

But Sarai, Abram’s wife, had no children. So Sarai took her servant, an Egyptian woman named Hagar, and gave her to Abram so she could bear his children. “The LORD has kept me from having any children,” Sarai said to Abram. “Go and sleep with my servant. Perhaps I can have children through her.” And Abram agreed.
          Genesis 16:1-2 (NIV)

When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they gathered around Aaron and said, “Come, make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.”
          Exodus 32:1 (NIV)

It was out of impatience that Abram and Sarai pursued having a child in an unnatural way.  It was out of impatience that the children of Israel asked for another God to worship. In both cases, the participants were looking at the situation around them not at the Lord. Had they been looking at the Lord, their hearts would have been renewed, their faith and bodies strengthened.

But those who wait on the Lord
Shall renew their strength;
          Isaiah 40:31a (KJV)

but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
          Isaiah 40:31a (NIV)

1 Corinthians 13:4 teaches us that “Love is patient” God is everlastingly patient with us, can we be anything else with Him? Let’s wait upon Him, put our hope in Him. Read what Scripture says about the promises of God:

For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God. 
          2 Corinthians 1:20

God is faithful to His promises – they are “Yes” in Christ – but the “Amen” is spoken by us through Christ to the Glory of God.

Let’s not be tempted to sin during the waiting but instead say “Amen” to the promises of a God who is faithful to fulfill them.

The LORD confides in those who fear him;
he makes his covenant known to them.
          Psalm 25:14 (NIV)

How cool is that? The Lord confides in those who fear (honor, revere) Him. God has been whispering to my husband and I lately. Many of you know that my husband, Phil, had a heart attack last week. It was a very serious one, but it appears that he will fully recover from it. I’m not ready to blog a lot about the experience, but in today’s reading I read Psalm 25:14. And I want to express to all of you my incredible thankfulness to a wonderful God of mercy, grace and power, who confides in those who fear Him.

During and since the heart attack God has spoken to us  – through other people, through His Word, through strong impressions in our heart, and through dreams. All have been consistent messages – Phil will be fine. Coupled with that was often a reminder of God’s promise of salvation  – the covenant He has with us  – that He will be with us always and that when this life is over, we will be with Him forever.

For today’s blog, let me just be one of those people who reminds you of the Covenant God has with you. If you have made Jesus the leader and Lord of your life, He promises that He will be with you through the most difficult times, that He will be there at the end of those times when you walk back into the sunlight of “normal” living, and that He will be with you when those times are ultimately over and your true life begins in heaven. In the midst of those difficult times you can experience peace. In the midst of those difficult times, and in between the difficult times of life, you can experience joy.

God will confide in you. What a wonderful promise. There’s another verse like it that often amazes me…

Surely the Sovereign LORD does nothing
without revealing his plan
to his servants the prophets.
       Amos 3:7 (NIV)

God wants to speak to us. What a wonderful, personal God we serve! Stay close to Him and listen.

He does not need to transplant us into a different field, but right where we are, with just the circumstances that surround us, He makes His sun to shine and His dew to fall upon us, and transforms the very things that were before our greatest hindrances into the chiefest and most blessed means of our growth. No difficulties in our case can baffle him. No dwarfing of your growth in years that are past, no apparent dryness of your inward springs of life, no crookedness or deformity in any of your past development, can in the least mar the perfect work that He will accomplish, if you will only put yourselves absolutely into His hands and let Him have His own way with you.
                                         Hannah Whitall Smith (1832-1911)

Quoted from page 45 of The NIV Worship Study Bible; published by Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, MI; copyright 2000 by The Corinthian Group, Inc., Dana Point, CA.

Joseph, the son of Jacob and Rachel, had a life defined by many things, but as I read through Genesis 37-40 this week, what struck me was the frequency and depth of betrayal that he experienced. Before his death, Joseph became an incredibly blessed man – he experienced reconciliation with his family, extreme professional success, and had great riches. But before any of those things occurred, he endured betrayal after betrayal after betrayal.

As I pondered this a bit, I was reminded that betrayal was a significant factor in Jesus’ life. It was as a result of betrayal that Jesus was arrested, accused and then sentenced to the cross. But it wasn’t just the betrayals of Judas, those at Jesus’ trial, and Pilate that sent Jesus to the cross. It goes way beyond that. The cross was only necessary because we had sinned and needed someone to save us from our sin. We had betrayed the Lord, and our betrayal sentenced Jesus to the cross. I had betrayed the Lord, and my betrayal sentenced Jesus to the cross.

Joseph is Betrayed…Again and Again
But I started out talking about Joseph’s experience with betrayal. Let’s return there. Joseph was betrayed by his brothers. OK, while what they did wasn’t right at all, maybe you can understand it. After all, Joseph was the bratty little brother who tattled on them (Genesis 37:2), was spoiled by his father (37:3), and thought he was better than his brothers (37:5-11). So they sold him into slavery.

But Joseph’s other betrayals were fully unprovoked.

• Potiphar’s wife accused him of raping her. He had not.
• Potiphar sent him to prison without giving him a chance to speak the truth.
• The Pharaoh’s cupbearer immediately forgot about Joseph once he was restored to his position of cupbearer.

And yet in each setback, God blessed Joseph. And, in fact, each betrayal led Joseph one step closer to the purpose God had for Joseph’s life. If his brothers had not betrayed him, Joseph would not have been in a position to be accused by Potiphar’s wife. If he had not been accused by Potiphar’s wife, Potiphar would hot have had the opportunity to have him thrown into prison. If Potiphar had not betrayed Joseph, the Cupbearer would not have had the opportunity to forget him until Pharaoh had his dream.

Betrayal – A Part of Life on This Earth
It seems to me that Joseph’s life is not too different from yours and mine. Betrayal is part of the package. It’s part of the package because we live in a sinful world and because we are sinners. All of us. Your best friend is a sinner. Your spouse is a sinner. Your children are sinners. The person you esteem most is a sinner. You are a sinner. I am a sinner. And sin is a betrayal. And if betrayal is in our very nature, we should not be surprised when we are betrayed. It’s part of the package.

Don’t misunderstand me. I am not suggesting you develop or nurse a pessimistic attitude. “No good deed goes unpunished” is a common sentiment, and one that I hate. I cringe every time I hear it because it reveals a root of pessimism that I believe does not honor God. Because truth, God’s Word, says that good deeds will be rewarded. Yes, we might experience betrayal in this life and our good deed might yield negative consequences for a short time, but our focus isn’t on this world. In the world we ought to be living for (i.e., the Kingdom of heaven), good deeds are blessed.

So Let’s Live for the Kingdom of God
What I am suggesting is that we focus on truth instead of lies. And since betrayal is not truth, since it is perpetrated by the father of lies, perhaps it ought not be our focus. I know that’s not an easy thing to do when you’ve been betrayed. I’ve been betrayed. Badly. It sent me into a tailspin. I understand the emotional damage that betrayal can cause. I admire Joseph for his apparent ability to shake it off quickly and continue to be faithful to do his best in each place he was put. I can’t help but wonder if his earlier dreams of what God had for him sustained him as he was continually pushed down. Scripture doesn’t say that, so we don’t know.

One instruction that Scripture does give us is to think about those things that are true and noble and right, those things that are pure and lovely and admirable, those things that are excellent and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). Let’s recognize betrayal for what it is – at the very root of our nature and from the hand of the Enemy. Then let’s turn our focus away from it and toward the One who faced our betrayal by stretching out His arms in love.

A Step Further
In each situation, Joseph continued to be faithful to God. Dr. Shane Johnson’s definition of success is this: “Doing the right thing over an extended period of time.” Notice that the definition doesn’t include anything about income or fame. He leaves the issues of income and fame to God and instead teaches that success is an issue of character. Success for Joseph wasn’t becoming governor of Egypt. His success was in not letting each betrayal keep him from being faithful in whatever position God placed him.

Betrayal is most devastating when it is a violation of trust from the hand of someone whom you have allowed to become close to you. The betrayal from a stranger affects your circumstances but doesn’t pierce your heart. The betrayal of a friend, a family member, or an authority figure has the power to debilitate you unlike that of other betrayals. These betrayals will come into your life, though. Remember, we are all sinful; betrayal is part of our sinful nature. We all have the capability to betray one another. The Enemy wants to use these inevitable betrayals to cause you to build a wall around yourself so that you let no one, not even God Himself, get close enough to hurt you like that again. But Joseph didn’t let the repeated betrayals of these significant people in his life shake his trust in God. He continued to do the right thing over an extended period of time, and that was the secret of his success. 

Think Kingdom living and keep at it. That’s what we are called to.

How very hard it can be to trust the Lord when we are in pain! It doesn’t matter whether the pain is physical, emotional or spiritual, it can be difficult to rest in God’s peace when the questions of “why?” and “when?” and “will He?” jab at our souls at every turn.

There was a time when I unequivocally said that I had the gift of faith. My ability to trust God went beyond myself — I just knew He was trustworthy and I could count on Him. That deep-down-in-your-spirit kind of knowing that you can’t really explain. That peace that surpasses all understanding.

Then life happened. Significant life. Significantly bad life. Don’t get me wrong. I am blessed. But in the midst of that blessed life, I experienced life circumstances that challenged the farthest reaches of my gift of faith.

I am on the recovery path from those circumstances. My path hasn’t been a straight one, by any means — I didn’t always do the right things — but I have learned some things along the way that might be helpful to others who are in the midst of “life.” In the following discussion, I continually use the word “healing.” Please realize that I am not necessarily talking about physical healing. If you have suffered a significant emotional blow, I mean emotional healing.

• There probably is no straight path to healing. Expect that you’ll take two steps forward and then fall back a step. Over time, the number of steps you move forward will begin to outweigh your backwards steps at a much greater ratio.That might mean measuring your progress in terms of months at first instead of weeks or days. Physical issues demonstrate this well — for the common cold, people expect to feel a little better each day, but recovery from abdominal surgery might take six weeks, and recovery from a stroke might take six months. When recovering from the surgery or stroke, you won’t sense that any healing has taken place on a daily basis. For those more significant setbacks in life, don’t even try to measure your progress toward healing on a daily basis — measure your progress in weeks or months.So don’t think of your goal as being past your current circumstances. Make your goal to move closer toward healing each week. Your ultimate goal is to be healed, but work toward the smaller goals and celebrate those incremental victories. There was a time when I said to my husband “I haven’t been angry for a week.” That was a step in my healing that took several months to achieve. It was worth celebrating.
• Don’t let setbacks discourage you. Don’t live in them. Don’t overly coddle yourself. Accept them as reality, set aside the disappointment, and continue moving forward. There is so much to be learned from the physical realm here: I am always shocked by the fourth day of a cold. Colds typically run something like this for me:     Day 1 — feel yucky
       Day 2 — feel like I’m going to die, or wish I would
       Day 3 — I’m amazed at how good I feel, Praise God that this cold was so short-lived
       Day 4 — feel only slightly better than I did on day 2 – what happened to yesterday?
       Day 5 — almost better
       Day 6 — back to normalThat’s the cycle that colds have run for me for the past 30 years. Yet each time I get a cold, I’m shocked at day 4. “How can I feel so bad when I was doing so well yesterday? I must be really sick!” Don’t be like me. Don’t be shocked by day 4. Don’t look forward to it, but don’t be shocked when you get hit by it and don’t be derailed by it. Set your discouragement aside and look toward tomorrow.
• Have someone that you can confide in who will reassure you of God’s goodness and of His continued love for you. I needed this more than I could have imagined. I needed someone to say, “Sandy, this is an aberration in your life. God is still being faithful to you. He still loves you. He will still use you in His kingdom.” It greatly embarrasses me to admit that my faith wavered so much. Like I said, I was a woman of faith. I had the gift of faith. I had always been able to believe God for things that others couldn’t see. In the midst of my pain, though, I couldn’t even see the things He was doing right in front of my eyes. I needed regular encouragement. And throughout the long process, I was continually reminded that my strengths were not my strengths after all. Qualities that I considered to be my strengths were fractured and broken, teaching me that I didn’t “own” my strengths — that I couldn’t sustain them, but that they were loaned to me by God and were sustained by Him alone.Notice that I wrote “have someone.” It is not healthy to go over your story again and again, even though that may be what you want to do. Have one person that you trust to whom you can pour out your heart and reveal your fears, and with whom you can celebrate your successes.
• The body requires rest to heal itself, whether from physical or emotional issues. Sleep often and don’t beat yourself up about it. Quit being superwoman or superman for awhile — drop some of your activities so that you have plenty of time to rest.
• Consider the importance of play! Be sure your schedule includes some things that bring you joy. Whether dancing or drawing, watching a movie or playing with the dog, be sure you take time for these things. You need the positive endorphins that your body releases when you are enjoying yourself. Make time for it.
• Be proactive about spending time with friends — probably in short duration at first, but be careful not to shut yourself off completely. The tendency when we feel pain is to draw back. If the pain is emotional, that means withdrawing from those who love us. Work hard not to do this.
• Don’t rely on your emotions. Your friends are still your friends, God still hears you and He still loves you, those closest to you still love you. Your world is not closing in on you. It may feel like it, but your emotions are not reality.
• Practice kindness and forgiveness in situations where kindness and forgiveness are easy. No matter what healing you need, forgiveness will play a part. You may need to forgive someone who hurt you, you may need to forgive yourself for past decisions or actions, and you may even need to forgive God. That doesn’t mean that God sinned against you. He didn’t. However, you may be laying things at His feet that cause you to be angry with Him. The process of releasing that anger is for you to forgive God for allowing you to go through the circumstances you’re in.
• In your heart, you will need to recognize that God’s ways are above your ways and that He is accomplishing His purposes through whatever has happened to you. But during that process, you may need to say, “Lord, forgive me.” ….. Grow your forgiveness muscle by forgiving all the little things that need to be forgiven. Some day you’ll be able to forgive the big things, too.I’ve learned that wounded people bruise easily. I caught myself becoming quite angry frequently during the process of healing. My latent anger turned into impatience at those around me. I needed to practice regular forgiveness for little things during that time. For example, a person who said something unkind offended me when in my “normal life” it wouldn’t have even registered. I needed to forgive her. The people around me in the grocery store all seemed more incompetent than they used to be. No, I was just less patient. I needed to confess that sin to God and extend kindness to every one of them.
• Don’t forsake God. Stay in church. Find a new church if you need to. Continue to read Scripture regularly, even if it’s just a few verses at a time. Continue to pray, even if you feel like your prayers are just bouncing off the ceiling. Do those activities that make you feel closest to God. For me that’s worship; for some, it’s study, and for others it’s service. Feed your soul. Your pain will rob it of it’s stored energy, so feed it often.

This blog has been a long time in coming. This morning during my devotions I read a verse that finally prompted me to write it:

⁸“My thoughts are completely different from yours,” says the LORD. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. ⁹For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.
            Isaiah 55:8-10, NLT

God is bigger than my pain. He always has been and always will be. His ways take my pain and turn it into a golden treasure. I am not yet at the point of seeing that treasure, but if there’s a progression from pain to treasure of clay, to treasure of silver, to treasure of gold, I would guess that I am somewhere between clay and silver. For that I am very thankful.

God may choose to heal you instantly. Rejoice! Praise Him! I know He can and often does heal instantly. He also allows us to journey through the healing process so that we learn to trust Him more and are able to help others through their healing process. I learned much about myself and God during my healing process. Some of the things I learned were things I didn’t want to know — how very weak and fragile I really am. But then God’s probably been trying to teach me that for years!

  ⁴⁰The people of Israel had lived in Egypt for 430 years.⁴¹In fact, it was on the last day of the 430th year that all the LORD’S forces left the land.⁴²This night had been reserved by the LORD to bring his people out from the land of Egypt, so this same night now belongs to him. It must be celebrated every year, from generation to generation, to remember the LORD’S deliverance.
                                                  Exodus 12:40-42

God had reserved that specific night as the night of deliverance for His people. God has reserved specific times for our deliverance. If you’re going through a trial, know that God has set aside a specific time for your deliverance. If you’re in bondage to some situation, know that God has set aside a specific time for your deliverance. Like the Israelites, be looking toward God and praying for your deliverance. Be obedient in the interim, but know that He has not abandoned you, any more than He abandoned the Israelites.

Mark 9:49 “[Jesus said] For everyone will be purified with fire.” (spoken by Jesus)

“EVERYONE will be purified with fire.” That means me. That means you. No one will escape.

“Everyone will be PURIFIED with fire.” Purify means (according to the Merriam-Webster Online dictionary) “to clear from material defilement or imperfection,” “to free from guilt or moral or ceremonial blemish,” and “to free from undesirable elements.”

“Everyone will be purified with FIRE.” Burning and painful, consuming, destroying. Even a small burn from touching a hot pan is painful. Even a light burn from spending too much time in the sun is painful. And then the burned area dies away. The word “fire” is often used to mean trials or ordeals.

What is Jesus teaching? That none of us will escape the process of being freed from material defilement, guilt and other undesirable elements. Wow! That sounds like a great promise, doesn’t it? I want to be freed from the gunk in my life! I want to be free from my attachment to material things. Yes, Lord!

“OK,” Jesus says. “The process for this is by burning it away with fire.” I shrink back and say, “But Lord, isn’t there another (easier) way?”

I want to escape the fire. I want to escape the trial. I want to avoid the unpleasantness and just live on Pleasant Lane in Friendly Town in the state of Prosperity. It’s the “life I want.” I bet you do too.

But God says that those undesirable elements in my life are not removed by life on Pleasant Lane. They are removed by fire. I can choose to live on Pleasant Lane, but I won’t be purified. And somehow I think that true joy doesn’t live on Pleasant Lane. It might visit occasionally to give me a taste of what I could have if I allowed Jesus to purify me.

You see, “burning” can also mean something else – it can mean passionate, as in “burning desire.” When we choose to follow Jesus and making Him our one true, burning desire, He will purify us. He will set us free from the bondage we cling to (life, the way we want it). He knows that the bondage we cling to is the very thing that keeps us from experiencing true joy. Life, the way I want it, is too self-centered and self-focused. Life the way Christ wants me to have it is freedom and courage to lay down my life and serve others. Jesus is speaking again in Mark 17:33 and says, “Whoever clings to this life will lose it, and whoever loses this life will save it.”

So what trial are you in the middle of? Rejoice, because you know it is the process Christ is using to bring freedom!